This week we sat down with Mr. Diamond and Miss Violit to talk about co-running Heroine Girls Clubhouse, a BDSM/fetish club in Baltimore, and what it’s like operating it as a couple. We also discussed how to introduce new people to the scene, as well as their dynamic as a couple who are both pro-dominants.
Heroine Girls’ Introduction to Kink
For Miss Violit’s Radioactive Spider Bite Into Kink, she explains that she was always a bit kinky. As a child she really liked playing rough with other kids, like teasing them, biting them, and pulling their hair. She always thought she was weird for enjoying hurting people, but as an adult, she found that she wasn’t the only one. Mr. Diamond also can’t point to one particular event where he realized he was kinky, but a memory that stands out is when a girl kicked him in the balls as a child. He also remembers a girl pulling his hair a few years later, and he realized that he loved the pain.
Heroine Girls BDSM Club
Mr. Diamond and Miss Violit run a kink and BDSM club called Heroine Girls Clubhouse in Baltimore, Maryland. Although the name is often mistaken to be drug-related, they named it because it’s mainly run by pro-dommes that consider themselves to be female superheroes. They wanted the name to relate to female empowerment because they want their club to feel comfortable to people who are not cis men—additionally, they set a limit on how many cis men can come to events.
Creating a Safe & Comfortable BDSM Club
They’ve tried to create an atmosphere similar to a bar at their club, except where you’re allowed to play. At their club, you’re able to just hang out and have a drink with other kinky people without pressure to participate in any activities. They have music, dancing, and all of the things you would find at a regular club, it’s just that you might also see someone getting whipped in the background. If you do want to play, they have lots of space for that, as well as a stage where kinky performances are put on. They get a lot of attendees who are completely new to kink, so they do their best to foster a comfortable and welcoming environment where many people are able to play for the first time.
A laid-back and fun environment is really important to Mr. Diamond and Ms. Violit, so they try to have fun kinky events planned every weekend. A lot of the time, even their bartenders will go on stage and join in on the fun. There are also private rooms called “cuddle rooms” for people to have privacy. There’s also a punishment closet and an enclosed outdoor play space. They talk about how they’ve even negotiated a situation where one customer regularly comes and just masturbates in the corner.
Reltionship Dynamic with Two Dominants
One thing we found particularly interesting is that Mr. Diamond and Miss Violit are both pro-dommes, as well as dominant types in everyday life. They don’t do much play together at home and pretty much save all of their play for working at the club. However, they do test their new toys and techniques on each other before using them on others. Another benefit of this type of relationship is that they both have an intimate understanding of the other’s work life and struggles, and therefore are able to better support each other in their professions. Co-domination is another way their kink lives intersect.
Finally, Miss Violit and Mr. Diamond answer listener questions about getting over anxiety when it comes to going to a BDSM club, their methods of vetting new attendees, how their club survived the pandemic, and more.
Additional Information
Thanks for listening! If you enjoyed this one, you’d probably like episodes 170 and 153.
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