Satisfyer is a brand I have been curious about for a while now. While it seems that they’ve managed to make more affordable versions of luxury style toys, I’ve always wondered if their models can actually stand up to any of the originals that they’re based on. Unfortunately, I hadn’t had the opportunity to try the majority of Satisfyer’s (or their competitors’) offerings, except for one of their penis sleeve style vibrators, which we weren’t a big fan of. Until now, as the Satisfyer Wand Penis Vibrator has made its way across my desk. Or…my nightstand? Wherever one’s sex toy inbox happens to be kept.
Seems easy to hold but in practice it’s harder then you think.
The wand is made out of ABS plastic and silicone and is completely waterproof and magnet-chargeable, so no fear of electrical mishaps should liquids be involved. The wings at the top are soft and flexible, which makes it easy to fit inside regardless of size. There are a few grooves that run along the inside that are supposed to catch lube and keep you gliding easy. There are three buttons, one to turn on and toggle the vibration patterns, and a plus and minus to adjust the strength of them. I put this toy by the bed for Dick one night and asked him to give it a shot. Which, in retrospect, was perhaps ill-advised. When I asked him about it later, he came back annoyed and confused: “How is this supposed to work? I tried it but couldn’t figure it out at all!” I personally thought it looked easy and was a bit confused as to why he was having trouble, so I decided to try it along with him.
Hoooo, boy. Suddenly, I understood. I lubed it up and gently maneuvered Dick’s…dick…between the wand’s folds. Easy, right? Well, only so far. Once it was there, I couldn’t figure out the best way to move it. It was impossible to stroke the entire length of his shaft because when you got part of the way up the handle, you couldn’t get access to the buttons anymore. The whole thing feels very clunky and it’s really only possible to stroke an inch or two. It was impossible to flip to the other side because then I would have to be underneath him somehow to stroke and I think we’d have the same problem. Also, it just really wasn’t comfortable for me to hold and I had to keep shifting my body into different positions to use it.
The flaps are flexible but the placement leaves much to be desired.
The vibration patterns I found to be quite confusing too. Some had long pauses and elaborate combinations that I personally can’t see being pleasurable at all. Of course, I don’t have a penis, so I asked Dick to help fill in the gaps:
How easy was it to handle? “I found it very difficult to handle, because unlike a classic stroker or bullet style vibrator that fits in your hand well, the shape of it seems to be difficult to hold in place while still getting any enjoyment out of it.”
Did you like the vibration and patterns? “The vibration was good, the patterns were not really doing it for me. But it was so hard to maneuver that it was hard to even experience the sensations.”
Would you use this again? “I’d like to give it another shot, but I don’t see how it’s going to be any different.”
Overall opinion? “It just made me feel frustrated that I was using it wrong. It never felt like I was doing it quite right. I even asked you if there was an instruction booklet with a picture on how the hell you’re supposed to hold it. I think if it had a full enclosure rather then wings, it would be more practical.”
Overall, Satisfyer has yet to impress me (or Dick for that matter) with their products. Affordably priced, sure, but if you can’t use it comfortably then I don’t see the point. Again, I haven’t tried the rest of their toys yet, so stay tuned in case I get any more in the future.
Thank you to SheVibe for sending me this toy in exchange for an honest review! If you want to see this or any number of other, probably better toys, use my affiliate link to visit SheVibe.com!
